"Self Care" Is Becoming Meaningless

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you think of self-care?

Going shopping? Getting a manicure? Buying coffee every morning?

All of these are great. But the internet has made self-care become an aspect of life that you have to be able to "afford".

Self-care is the aspect of our lives that has to exist throughout what we do. We can't intermittently decide that our bodies are worthwhile enough to take care of. An obvious juxtapose to what self-care means, is that with time, we have started to decide that self-care is just spoiling ourselves. Don't get me wrong, it's great to treat yourself once in a while, but that isn't actually self-care.

Self-care is taking care of ourselves no matter how busy we are, because without health, nothing else can come to us. But we are treating it as something that needs to be bought. Let's examine Maslow's hierarchy of needs: First is physiological needs, second is safety and security, third is love and belonging, fourth is self-esteem, and fifth is self-actualization. In all of these things, there is no mention of having to buy yourself new clothing or new shoes every month. It's plain and simple - these are the things that a human-being needs, and it's up to us to fulfill those needs.

If how we fulfill our needs is up to us, then why do we feel obliged to follow what the internet says is "self-care"? Especially since that definition changes with every decade. In the 90s, it included using cucumber melon or pear-scented lotions and body splashes. In the 2000s, self-care was marketed as buying products, spa treatments, and makeup. In the 2010s, self-care became cultural reliance on bath bombs, scented soy candles, face masks, and athleisure as daily coping mechanisms. And now, in our current decade, all of these trends have evolved into a consumerism approach to self-care.

I don't mean to offend anyone based on their spending habits. In fact, I'm thrilled if you are able to afford to buy yourself nice things. However, I do intend to offend the people who are pushing the narrative of self-care being based on things that you buy.

Self-care was never meant to be complicated. It was meant to be living in the small moments, and showing gratitude no matter what. Self-care was supposed to not only be the rejuvenation of the body, but also of the soul and the mind. We aren't really taking care of ourselves if we have to force ourselves to try a new drink every week, or get a manicure every months.

Self-care is defined by what makes you feel happier and more content. Don't force yourself into a box that is shaped by what the media says.